Category Archives: Read the Spirit

In connection with readthespirit.com, matters of the spirit, religion, philosophy, the soul’s yearnings.

Debra Darvick: Heirlooms of Thoreau, Whitman, Seurat and …

I was never one of those kids who played house all the time. I didn’t have rafts of baby dolls whom I fed little plastic bottles filled with pretend milk before putting them to bed in shoebox cribs lined with fabric scraps borrowed from my mother’s sewing box. I never gave future children much thought. Except now I realize that I did—in the things I began to acquire or create over the years.

When I was 11, my mother taught me how to embroider, giving me a kit that featured a quote by Thoreau printed on a piece of off-white linen. No pioneer alphabet samplers for my literary mother. Only Thoreau would do. There was a rainbow of embroidery floss, a tiny scissor, a round wooden hoop, and needles I quickly grew to respect. I loved decoding the semaphore of squiggles instructing me which birds were to have blue bodies and grey wings, which had brown beaks and which ones yellow. It was never framed when I finished it, but I saved that embroidery year after year somehow knowing that when I had a child, it would hang in her room. It did and still does, above Emma’s dresser.

I embroidered a second canvas after coming across a Walt Whitman poem while doing research for a children’s publisher.  My mother’s literary influence, no doubt.  I loved the poem’s spirit and the poet’s celebration of childhood. It, too, became part of the for-future-children trousseau. When my son Elliot was born, I chose a bright red frame, and hung it on the wall above the foot of his crib,  so that it would be the first thing he would see when he woke up. I just love that last line—the singer, the song and the sung—and suppose I chose the poem with the hope that my children would embody Whitman’s words.

I spent my junior year abroad and of all the things I brought home, the one that remains (aside from a love of speaking French and great memories) is a Seurat reproduction of circus performers.  I was transfixed by it, as I was by so many masterpieces in the Jeu de Paume at the time.  I bought quite a few reproductions, but the Seurat is the only one I held on to down through the years, knowing I would frame it for the future children I rarely thought about. It hung in the kids’ bathroom for years before making its way down to a wall in the playroom.

But the one purchase that still startles me for its extravagance is a gold and diamond ring I bought with birthday money my grandparents gave me when I turned 22. I had just moved to New York and was staying with my Aunt Joyce and Uncle Marty on the Upper West Side, job hunting and trying to start my adult life. I was living on the tip money I had earned through a summer of waitressing. New York was costlier than I had imagined. But there was an art fair on Columbus Avenue. And I had been firmly instructed not to put my birthday gift toward future rent or subway rides. The irregularly shaped hammered gold band with three small diamond chips in it cost exactly what my grandparents had given me. The jeweler was a cute hippie with dark brown eyes and a killer smile. How could I not? When I slipped the ring on my finger, it fit perfectly.

And again the thought, I will give this to my daughter one day. It fits her perfectly, too.

If an heirloom is something handed down through the generations, what do you call treasures gathered for a generation that hasn’t yet come into being? A prayerloom? And what about you, loyal readers? Is there a ‘prayerloom’ in your closet or drawer? Something that you have tucked away for a future child or grandchild? Share a photo and a few (or more) words about the item — its history, whom you are saving it for and why. It would be fun to create a semi-regular feature around these treasures.  Send your contribution to [email protected] and we’ll see where this takes us. Somewhere special, I have no doubt.

Debra Darvick reviews With a Mighty Hand by Amy Ehrlich

With Rosh Hashana arriving Wednesday night, and being one of the People of the Book, I thought that it would be good to begin the new year 5774 with three book reviews. Come back next Monday and Wednesday for two more.

When I received a review copy of With a Mighty Hand: The Story in the Torah, I swooned. At a time when the printed word seems to be hanging in the balance, and the Nones are a newsworthy phenomenon, it was more than heartening to read this beautiful volume, an illustrated retelling of Bible stories. In hardback no less!

Candlewick Press deserves high praise for publishing this beautiful volume.

In author Amy Ehrlich’s capable hands, the stories in the Torah (the Hebrew Bible) come to life in vivid prose that hews quite close to the original text. Ehrlich distills the Five Books of Moses into a single narrative. Children’s bible stories often focus on those passages rich with visual potential—while skipping the darker side of these stories. This is not your father’s Golden Bible version.  Ehrlich presents the Torah in full: animals marching two by two and Noah drunk from wine, exposed in nakedness to his son Ham. Recounted are the days of creation as well as Adam and Eve’s blame-shifting conversation with God after they ate the forbidden fruit.  What an opportunity to talk to a child about taking responsibility for one’s actions and the all-too-human tendency to lay blame elsewhere.

Reading the Tree of Knowledge chapter this time around, I saw something new in the text. The serpent’s punishment is to crawl upon the ground, metaphorically eating dust all the days of his life. Dust figures in Adam’s fate as well: He will not live forever but will return to dust. Eve, however, is punished not with dust, nor with bearing children in pain as I have always understood it. She is punished with a multiplication of the pain of her childbirth. This passage, as presented by Ehrlich, raises two questions. What does it mean that Eve’s punishment has nothing to do with dust? And second, was Eve’s punishment lighter than Adam’s and the snake’s? Admittedly, childbirth is no walk in the park, but the text seems to be telling us that God would multiply a pain that was already Eve’s destiny come childbirth. The snake lost its legs, left to crawl belly-to-dirt for all time and Adam lost eternal life in the Garden, both consequences that had no mirror pre-forbidden fruit.

Daniel Nevins, the artist chosen to illustrate the book, has done glorious work. His paintings have a depth and solidity in both his figures and in his color palette that echo well the seriousness of the text.  There is poignancy, too. Nevins’ illustration of Moses, post Golden Calf, is heart-breaking.  The father of this wayward tribe of Hebrews kneels prostrate upon the ground, his staff and the tablets are strewn upon the earth beside him. Moses, one hand on the ground, one resting upon the back of his head, holds a posture of such submission and defeat that one can almost hear him weeping in fury and frustration. Nevins rendered the splitting of the Sea of Reeds as a double-page spread with the yabasha, the dry ground, turning the interior of the book’s spine into part of the Israelites’ path to freedom.  The whitecaps of the waves reach like hands from the confines of the pages. He was a marvelous choice to bring these stories to visual life.

There are any number of reasons why I’m eager for grandchildren one day. With a Mighty Hand gives me another reason.  I dream of quiet afternoons and evenings reading portions of this beautiful book with them, visiting and revisiting the text, exploring the illustrations, discussing the moral issues inherent in each chapter. The Hebrew Bible is a storybook like no other, as relevant today as the day it was given, because its stories speak to us all. I look forward to the day it speaks to my children’s children.  May God bless me so.

WITH A MIGHTY HAND. Text copyright © 2013 by Amy Ehrlich. Illustrations copyright © 2013 by Daniel Nevins. Reproduced by permission of the publisher, Candlewick Press, Somerville, MA.

My dream comes true: Following in Dear Abby’s footsteps

This letter from Ann Landers was one of the greatest thrills of my young life!

I‘ve had a lifelong passion for advice columnists, starting with Dear Abby when I was about nine or ten. This was my after-school routine: get home at three-thirty; grab the pertinent section of the Atlanta Journal-Constitution; head for my room where I’d sprawl on my floor and pore over the day’s crop of troubles. Unruly children, family spats, unrequited love. Dear Abby always had an answer, soothing words of good sense that tied up each day’s angst with a bow.

HOW TWIN SISTERS CONQUERED AMERICAN JOURNALISM

The rise of American advice columns really rests on the shoulders of twin sisters: Dear Abby was born on the Fourth of July 1918 as Pauline “Popo” Esther Friedman in Sioux City, Iowa, to Russian Jewish immigrants. Her twin sister was Esther “Eppie” Pauline Friedman, better known to the world years later as Ann Landers. Both studied journalism and psychology in college.

For a while, the sisters even managed their love lives in tandem. They were married in a joint ceremony in 1939: Popo to Morton Philips, which made her real name Pauline Phillips, and Eppie to Julius Lederer, after which she signed her real name Eppie Lederer.

Popo took over an ongoing Chicago Sun Times byline, Ann Landers, in 1955—although not even trivia champs will recall the journalist who created the column (a Chicago nurse named Ruth Crowley, who wrote from 1943 until her death in 1955).

Eppie started a year later at the San Francisco Chronicle and got to choose her own pen name. She turned to the Bible, to Samuel, where it said in her English translation of scripture: “Then David said to Abigail … ‘Blessed is your advice and blessed are you.” In their prime, the Friedman sisters each had an audience of about 100 million readers, although Abby always claimed slightly more.

As they rose in fame, newspapers, magazines and even standard reference books began to list the Friedman sisters among the world’s most influential women. They also became infamously estranged from each other.

HOW MY GRANDMOTHER MET ANN LANDERS
… AND I JOINED ANN’S RANKS

One of the greatest thrills of my young life was hearing my grandmother tell the story of meeting Ann Landers! They had met at a benefit event in Birmingham, Alabama. Sometime during the evening, Eppie had a run in her hose or a tear in her skirt. Whatever the wardrobe malfunction, my grandmother had supplied the necessary fixes. Above, today, you’ve seen the letter of thanks Eppie wrote to my grandmother, whose mother’s maiden name was Lederer.

Flash forward forty-something years to this past February when the Detroit Jewish News put out a call for an advice columnist for their monthly edition of the Red Thread.  I leapt at the chance, wanting it in the worst way. I was determined to snare the gig if at all possible and honed and shaped my responses to the three test questions.

Come March I learned that I had been chosen. A childhood dream had come true—the advice column was mine.

Huzzah!!

ABBY, ANN … AND THE MAYTAG REPAIRMAN

But these days I’m feeling less like Dear Abby and more like the Maytag repairman, who famously moans: “No one calls!” Or, in my case: No one writes! Well, almost no one.

Wit, wisdom, and well-prepped advice languish in the ether, in that space where my sechel* meets my fingertips and my fingertips meet my keyboard. You can’t tell me that in a Jewish community of tens of thousands there’s no heartache? No dilemmas crying out for solutions? No tussles over who eats where and with whom for the Holidays? No eccentric relatives who spill the beans at inopportune moments? No twenty-somethings stymied over how to get the ‘rents to lighten up and stop interfering? And what’s more, heartache knows no denomination. You don’t have to be Jewish to write to Dear Debra. Troubles are universal.

So nu? What are you waiting for? Dig Dear Debra out of her doldrums. If you’re aiming at my southeast Michigan Red Thread advice column, connected with the Jewish News, then direct your dilemmas to me at [email protected]. Read more of those Dear Debra columns here.

And what if you’re not Jewish? Well, my motto is: Heartache knows no denomination. So, if you want to reach me as Debra Darvick—the Read The Spirit author, columnist and roving public speaker—email me via [email protected].

* common sense; reason; street smarts

Voices & Visions: Art inspired by Jewish wisdom

Last Saturday in synagogue, instead of a sermon, we had a fabulous discussion inspired by  the Voices & Visions™ project, an exhibit sponsored by the Harold Grinspoon Foundation. Voices & Visions™ is about art, about powerful messages, about combining them into posters, about starting conversations, about continuing the Jewish journey.

The exhibit consists of 18 posters melding Jewish wisdom (quotes by Maimonides, Martin Buber, Susan Sontag and more) and art created by today’s top graphic designers and illustrators. Although I find it hard to believe that the work of only two women—Carin Goldberg and Paula Scher—made the cut. Goldberg’s effective illustration (A human being is like a letter of the alphabet: to produce a word it must combine with another) embedded the quote within an alphabet, forcing the reader to decode it one word at a time and heightening the quote’s power and message. Scher’s illustration, simple and streamlined, brought to life Rabbi Abraham Joshua Heschel’s famous quote, “When I marched in Selma, I felt my legs were praying.”

During what would have been the break for sermon, we trooped into the social hall to view the posters. There were additional copies for us to bring to the tables set up around the room for discussion. With our favorites in hand, we did what Jews do best—we talked. About the posters, about the quotes, about the integration of the images and the thoughts that inspired them. Susan’s Sontag’s words on silence, Silence remains inescapably a form of speech  were paired with images of American Sign Language.

I was drawn to a quote by Maimonides, A miracle cannot prove what is impossible; it only confirms what is possible.  Seymour Chwast’s illustration and Daniel Gordis’ commentary were fabulous accompaniments, one of the most effective pairings, I thought. Can you find Jonah and the whale? Hint: Use your head.

A friend and I both went for image above featuring the colorful arcs and the quote by Martin Buber, All journeys have a secret destination of which the traveler is unaware. Paul commented that initially the arcs are rendered in primary colors. As the illustration progresses there is a shift to secondary colors. His keen observation totally escaped me. My take on it was a bit more pedestrian, in that I focused on the fact that some roads led to nowhere, others intersected, and still others went in two directions at once.

What piqued my interest even more was Bubers’ choice of the word “secret.” Why a secret destination instead of one hidden or unknown? Hidden and unknown imply destinations that may never come to light. Yes, secret-keeping has a dark side, but it also has the promise of felicity and surprise. It holds the promise of eventual revelation.  Secret implies a dyad—one entity possesses knowledge that the other will ultimately realize. Perhaps Buber was suggesting the Divine hand shaping our path has scattered it with gems of revelation for us to find. Some will undoubtedly be dark as coal; but others, if we are fortunate and manage a glass-half-full kind of perspective, will ultimately sparkle with diamond-like clarity.

Voices & Visions™ is a brilliant collaboration and one that I plan to revisit. Visit the site or check out the video .

Which poster resonates with you?

What quote draws you in?

Share the vision by sharing this column via Facebook. Please, click the blue-“f” Facebook icon, like this column and, together, we’ll tell others about this creative resource.

What’s your favorite yoga asana? Pose of the warrior?

Warrior is one of the first asanas (poses) that beginning yoga students learn, and one that all students continue to perfect over the years.  The stance: back leg is straight, front leg is bent at 90 degree angle with knee “tracking”  toward pinkie of the front bent leg.  The heel of the front foot is lined up with the instep of the back. Arms are extended, palms down; head is turned in the direction of the front extended arm.

It is a strong and powerful pose,  what with the hands extended like blades in opposing directions as if to challenge and/or defend from ahead and behind. The feet and legs are placed in such a way as to give stability yet with the arms extended, there is also a delicious lightness in the torso.  Whenever this one is comes up in class, I settle into the now-familiar feelings of stability and confidence. It’s comfortable, dependable, makes me feel good. Every now and then I assume the pose of the Warrior before doing something arduous or meeting  up with what I know will be  a difficult person or situation.  Fitting my body into the skin of the Warrior pose gives an instant shot of confidence.

There is a variation on Warrior that brings a curious complexity. The pose of the Gentle Warrior is a true contradiction in terms yet it teaches something crucial. Here’s how it goes: assume the traditional Warrior as above. Now turn your hands palm up. That’s it. A 180º turn of the wrists and the entire pose is changed, its entire feeling and intent transformed. In Gentle Warrior one stands  in strength, in a powerful and somewhat aggressive position, and yet, with the hands turned palms-up, there is vulnerability, invitation. “Come closer,” says this asana, not in a “Go ahead, make my day” taunt, but in a spirit of engagement.  The Gentle Warrior says, “Come here. I am willing to meet you and I am strong enough for the encounter I am inviting you into.”

Over time, processing the inner meaning of this pose has enabled me to engage better with difficult people. Not all the time, by any means. But just having the body memory of strength and lightness, enables me to deal more securely with folks and situations that can make my heart pound. Over the years, in class after class, I toggle between Warrior and its gentler twin. I enjoy the feelings both asanas impart. It’s not about vanquishing an opponent so much as engaging from a place of confidence and security. A place of knowing what I have to offer and doing so with invitation, kindness and firm boundaries.

What is your favorite yoga pose?

What does it give to you each time you practice it?

Sharing this post with your favorite yogis and yoginis will bring you extra good karma this week. You can share this, so easily, by clicking on the blue-“f” Facebook icon or the envelope-shaped icon for email.

And, I can’t close this column without expressing gratitude to Katherine Austin and all my wonderful teachers at Karma Yoga and to Yvette Cobb at Yoga for Life.

Did Mr. McGregor Ever Try Non-Attachment?

The lilies were mere days from opening. Six stalks heavy with close to three dozen blossoms, each blossom swaddled within its own petals. In full bloom they would soon measure five to six inches in circumference,  bright white petals outlined in deep pink.  I went out to check on them yesterday and …

They were gone.

Every. Last. One. Vanished.

Each flower had been snipped off at the base of the bud.  And to add to the mayhem, mystery:  the severed blossoms were nowhere in sight. It was as if someone had come in the middle of the night, clipped them with a hedge trimmer and made off in the dark with my long-awaited botanical bounty.

Who or what could have done this? It would have been one thing if the blossoms had been scattered four feet below on the ground around the base of the plants. The rabbits love to do that. It’s a special bunny game called Torture-the-Gardener. It goes like this: watch for the tulips to bloom that the Gardener planted last fall. Await her cries of delight and excitement as the tulip flowers are 17 hours from fully opening.  Creep out in the light of a spring moon, nibble them off at the bases and leave the petals scattered like so much dead confetti for Gardener to find when she comes out the following morning. Enjoy watching her scream and steam. Cover Baby Bunny’s ears from the foul language.

I’ve quit skirmishing with the chipmunks of late. They’re impervious to the taste of Tabasco, use  putrid egg potion as perfume, are dextrous enough to pilfer a single nut from my Hav-a-Heart traps. But they couldn’t have climbed the lilies’ sturdy stalks, could they? Bitten off the flowers one blossom at a time and carried them down into their little chippie tunnels? Had they invented specialized lily-ladders? Or had deer come for a midnight snack? I saw no tell-tale prints, nor droppings, but I have seen a few of these white-tailed destroyers every now and then in the neighborhood. As far as I know, I have no human enemies, no neighborhood gardeners who envy my echinacea.  Irrelevant, who did the dastardly deed. I am nevertheless lily-less.

A few years ago, staring at those stems, shorn of all that potential and imminent beauty, I would have been truly livid. Today, I just shrug. It’s not worth the wrath. So the deer ate the lilies. Or the chipmunks managed to pilfer them in some way, lock, stock and stamen. Maybe it’s all the yoga. Or maybe thirty years of tilling these dear patches of earth, riding the peaks and valleys of growth and destruction has taught me non-attachment.  Maybe this is what a Zen garden truly is — not one of tenderly raked gravel and exquisitely pruned shrubs.  But a garden where destruction is met with equanimity and joy can still be savored in what was potential and imminent.

How is your garden growing? Share this column with your gardening buddies by clicking Facebook’s “f”.  And if you have some tricks to keep the varmints at bay, do tell.

Nuit Blanche

Here I am again at 4 AM.  Awake.  Sleepless. Torn between getting up and using this extra time in some productive way, and turning over and courting Morpheus.  I read somewhere that waking up at 4 AM (as opposed to 2 AM or 5 AM) signifies deep sadness and mourning.  Maybe I’m just mourning not being able to sleep till morning. Never read what 2 AM or 5 AM awakenings signify — indigestion and the need for a potty call, perhaps?

My yoga teachers say this is the perfect time to meditate, that the veil between the worlds is thinner on dawn’s cusp.  Which worlds would that be: the world of the sleep-blessed and the sleep-hungry?  I’ve never managed to access a world beyond the veil; as it is for most novices, meditation is a challenge. Sometimes I curl up against my husband, small comma nestling into larger one, and hope to end this sentence of sleeplessness. Other times, such as now, I abandon all hope of sleep and set to writing/thinking/considering….

Veils or no, there is indeed something magical about this time of night-into-day. The birds are awake and at it: baw-weep-weep-weep calls one; chi chi chi-chichitter calls another. The crows caw out their daily updates and the mourning doves trade plaints.  Beyond my window, a robin is bouncing on the roof. Is she really cocking her head and peering back at me as I write and watch her? The trees begin to emerge in the growing light. What moments before was a block of black now begins to recede, revealing a silhouette of branches, leaves, limbs. Soon enough the silhouettes give way to a swath of variegated greens . The hydrangeas appear; I swoon over the magical blue of them. It has taken three summers to get the soil acidic enough to mimic a Cape Cod sky. Pale pinks sometime streak the clouds at dawn; but not today. After a second night of rain, the heavens above remain white, heavy, wet. It is bright enough now to see the leafless limbs of our last elm tree. One more mighty giant is going to fall. The garden will be transformed once again: shade loving plants will give way to sun worshippers. Just as I get it going, I’m going to have to retrench and get out the books again. What will I lose? What might I replace it with? Three decades of gardening under my belt, I know not to fight it. This is the way of nature.

It is now close to six. Another nuit blanche, as the French call them, is gone. Time, perhaps, for a ninety minute cat-nap, and then a peaceful still-early morning walk to yoga.